tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5518122161715399657.post4121401682063278338..comments2023-08-06T10:03:00.038-05:00Comments on POSSIBLY IRRITATING ESSAYS: Where Writing, Christianity, and Speculative Fiction Interact : WRITING ADVICE: Nathan Bransford 7 – How To Write A SynopsisGuyStewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01268114053763665577noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5518122161715399657.post-34780539585205027222010-09-19T00:38:56.760-05:002010-09-19T00:38:56.760-05:00You asked; that's permission.
I think it lose...You asked; that's permission.<br /><br />I think it loses it's rhythm at the list separated by semi-colons. Maybe if it weren't focused on them being on that ship, you could break the info out of the list and keep the rhythm. Also, it isn't clear in the 4th sentence who's "his world" belongs to. If we're being anal retentive, the transcendent beings could be manipulating "both" WheetAh and Humans, or "both" humans and space - it's clear by context, but not grammatically. And it's incorrect to start sentences with the word "and."<br /><br />Plus, your alien's name spelled backwards is pronounced "Hate You."Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06229192643163784074noreply@blogger.com