Edwina Olds, Lieutenant, WACS
(ret.) slid out of the truck and down to the ground, shutting the door as quiet
as possible, but the boys could hear the voices clear as a bell in the cold,
very, very early morning Canadian air.
A man’s voice said, “You know
we got a radio call about someone making trouble all the way up the western
shore of Lake Superior, ma’am.”
Edwina said, “Really? Round
about where?”
“Starting in Duluth and
making their way from there to Two Harbors...”
“What’d they do in Two
Harbors? My brother’s a pastor there!”
There was a long pause, then
the man said, “I heard from the radio that they ran through the church buck
naked and scared all the...”
“Who was buck naked?” Edwina
interrupted him. Tommy Hastings had to leaning against Freddie Merrill on the
floor of the logging truck cab when the younger boy tried to squirm free and
give the man speaking a piece of his fist.
“Well, I don’t rightly know, ma’am...”
Another voice interrupted. It
was a woman’s voice. The Witch of Anoka. She said, “It’s not for us to ask, ma’am.
That’s just what the…”
“Certainly it is for me to
ask, whoever you are! I see you’re not wearing a uniform, so you’re a civilian
so you’re no more authorized to conduct this ridiculous interview than I am!”
“I’ll have you know, ma’am, that I am...”
“And I’ll have YOU know missy,
that I’m a retired lieutenant of the United States Women’s Army Corp and have
served in New Guinea! So, if you value your good looks, you’ll back off and let
me speak with this Custom’s Officer.”
The Witch of Anoka sputtered then said, “I have half a mind to curse you, woman!”
Edwina laughed out loud for
some time before catching her breath and saying, “First of all lady, I don’t
believe in witches, I don’t believe you are one and I don’t believe you cursing
me will do anything but make you short of breath.”
“How dare you! My curses...”
“Aren’t worth the air it
takes to breathe ‘em. I’m a good Christian woman with a good, solid
relationship with Jesus Christ and I will thank you to cast your curses in a
direction where they might actually do some bad work. Now, since I figure you’re
the one making this youngster so uncomfortable and you’re the one pushing him
to hassle me, I’m going to say good night and get back into my truck.”
“You have two boys in your
cab!” she cried out. “They’re the real reason for all this trouble! Just give
them to me and I’ll leave you alone.”
“Why would I give them to
you, missy? You their momma?”
“No, of course not, I’m
too...”
“I can see you ain’t their
daddy.” The customs officer let loose with a guffaw. The Anoka Witch scowled at
him, but he was now standing closer to Edwina than her and he had one hand on
his gun. She saw a narrowing of his eyes and stepped a bit away. Edwina
continued, “Are you their aunty?”
“I’m...I’m…”
Edwina lifted her chin, “Don’t
think I’ll be giving you enough time to make up some sort of slightly
believable lie. I don’t think this customs agent is going to believe you
anymore. Besides,” she jerked open the door of the cab. “I said I was traveling
alone. I am and if the main cause of your trouble is two boys, you’d best be getting
back on the road again and looking for them.
The floor was unoccupied, the
door was close and even after she shrieked and ran around to the passenger’s
door, she found it closed and locked and no tracks left by mischievous boys
teenaged boys. She ran around the back of the trailer for good measure then
stopped in front of Edwina and exclaimed, “What did you do with them?” She spun
to the customs officer and pointing at Edwina, exclaimed, “She killed them!
Dumped their bodies in the Lake! Arrest her! She’s a murderess!”
Edwina looked down at the
woman, scowled then turned an climbed back into the cab.
The Witch of Anoka screamed
and threw herself after Edwina, but the officer caught her by the arm and
yanked her back. The witch screamed, “Unhand me young man!”
He dragged her away from the
cab, saying, “I think you’ve had enough to drink tonight, lady.”
“Drink? How dare you…” her
rant was drowned out by the revving of the logging truck as it pulled away from
the customs stop. Edwina stuck her arm out and waved as she crossed from the
United State of America and into the Canadian wilderness.
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