"the rumor in the store was that you could build an entire house by waiting patiently for a year while EVERYTHING went on sale"
…Rolling down the driveway, I suddenly had a thought and snickered.
When my wife asked, “What?” I shook my head. “No, what?”
I reiterated the train of thought above, then added, “I was wondering if it would be possible to build a colony on the Moon using just what you could buy at Knox?”
We pondered it for a few moments, then suddenly said in unison, “Yes!”
Inspired by Matt Weir, the result of my musings continues below.
Felix Jax, youngest member of the Jax Family Youth Coalition and it’s undisputed leadership. “A solution to the troubling problem of the test pilots – both AI and Human – to experience profound…not to put it delicately or dance around it, bouts of suicidal depression and a tendency to kill themselves before being debriefed upon their return from brief forays into interstellar space.”
Someone behind me muttered, “I’d be happy to debrief Felix.” I turned to scowl at several of his birth cohort, male, female, and trans-either-way. They uniformly cringed, fingers twitching enough for me to be pretty sure they were have trouble reconciling their desire to curry favor with me…or be violently dealt with by Felix. “Watch it, kids.” I whispered, then grunted and turned back to the meeting. I raised my hand.
Felix nodded to me, smirking. He’d heard the commentary and raised both brows. I said, “As a former member of the test pilot cohort, I’d like to ask everyone here to give me your absolutely serious attention.” I shot a glance over my shoulder and the “peanut gallery” settled down. I searched for Tiananmen – aka “Gate of Heavenly Peace”, or HP for short – found her and nodded.
She stood, walking forward. She removed a blonde wig and with a flick of her hand, resolved the hologram mask over her face.
Her old face reappeared and most of the people in the meeting gasped. She stopped not far from me and said, “I’m not back from the dead, just back from some serious counseling.” No one spoke, though most of them could have. Everyone in the room had spoken for or against her inclusion in our FTL program at one time or another.
“I know you all believed that I killed myself because of what I came face-to-face with after making a record number of jumps to interstellar space.” Lots of nods, more wide-eyed-amazement. There were even faces that displayed sheer horror. I nodded to Tiananmen. “I didn’t kill myself. I faked my death in order to talk with Felix and Grandpa about the future of Jax Lunar Lumber and the exploration of Strange New Worlds.” She shot me a look. We both had come to enjoy a century-old flattie “television program”, re-engineered in full-immersive ThreeDee.”
I raised a finger. Her dark skin turned maroon in embarrassment and she nodded. Clearing her throat, she said, “In case you are unfamiliar with…”
Felix said, “We all know your infatuation with that moldy-old show of Grandpa’s. Just get on with it!”
She lifted her chin. “You and I can have a very important conversation later, Cousin.” Felix blanched. He’d inherited nearly translucently pale skin that blushed a spectacular pink. Which he hated and Tiananmen loved to set off at every opportunity. She continued as if nothing had happened, “Oddly, the strange new world we have a chance to explore not only for the family and Jax Lunar Lumber, but also for all of Humanity; happens to need us.” She paused as everyone leaned forward to hear the wonderful news, she continued, “But, unprepared in every way, the trip to the world will kill you. Just as it killed me. I’d have died if the Aliens hadn’t been waiting for me the moment I popped out of transspace.” There was silence. She smiled, looked at me, adding, “And we’ll need the total cooperation of Master Cheat and All-around Pain-in-our-collective-posterior, Sturdlan Vilbix.”
The Board Room exploded in the jeers, catcalls, boos, and an amazing calling-down-of-curses.
Resources: The Moon Trees, https://www.urbanforestdweller.com/we-almost-forgot-about-the-moon-trees/ ; https://www.space.com/moon-colonists-lunar-lava-tubes.html
When my wife asked, “What?” I shook my head. “No, what?”
I reiterated the train of thought above, then added, “I was wondering if it would be possible to build a colony on the Moon using just what you could buy at Knox?”
We pondered it for a few moments, then suddenly said in unison, “Yes!”
Inspired by Matt Weir, the result of my musings continues below.
Felix Jax, youngest member of the Jax Family Youth Coalition and it’s undisputed leadership. “A solution to the troubling problem of the test pilots – both AI and Human – to experience profound…not to put it delicately or dance around it, bouts of suicidal depression and a tendency to kill themselves before being debriefed upon their return from brief forays into interstellar space.”
Someone behind me muttered, “I’d be happy to debrief Felix.” I turned to scowl at several of his birth cohort, male, female, and trans-either-way. They uniformly cringed, fingers twitching enough for me to be pretty sure they were have trouble reconciling their desire to curry favor with me…or be violently dealt with by Felix. “Watch it, kids.” I whispered, then grunted and turned back to the meeting. I raised my hand.
Felix nodded to me, smirking. He’d heard the commentary and raised both brows. I said, “As a former member of the test pilot cohort, I’d like to ask everyone here to give me your absolutely serious attention.” I shot a glance over my shoulder and the “peanut gallery” settled down. I searched for Tiananmen – aka “Gate of Heavenly Peace”, or HP for short – found her and nodded.
She stood, walking forward. She removed a blonde wig and with a flick of her hand, resolved the hologram mask over her face.
Her old face reappeared and most of the people in the meeting gasped. She stopped not far from me and said, “I’m not back from the dead, just back from some serious counseling.” No one spoke, though most of them could have. Everyone in the room had spoken for or against her inclusion in our FTL program at one time or another.
“I know you all believed that I killed myself because of what I came face-to-face with after making a record number of jumps to interstellar space.” Lots of nods, more wide-eyed-amazement. There were even faces that displayed sheer horror. I nodded to Tiananmen. “I didn’t kill myself. I faked my death in order to talk with Felix and Grandpa about the future of Jax Lunar Lumber and the exploration of Strange New Worlds.” She shot me a look. We both had come to enjoy a century-old flattie “television program”, re-engineered in full-immersive ThreeDee.”
I raised a finger. Her dark skin turned maroon in embarrassment and she nodded. Clearing her throat, she said, “In case you are unfamiliar with…”
Felix said, “We all know your infatuation with that moldy-old show of Grandpa’s. Just get on with it!”
She lifted her chin. “You and I can have a very important conversation later, Cousin.” Felix blanched. He’d inherited nearly translucently pale skin that blushed a spectacular pink. Which he hated and Tiananmen loved to set off at every opportunity. She continued as if nothing had happened, “Oddly, the strange new world we have a chance to explore not only for the family and Jax Lunar Lumber, but also for all of Humanity; happens to need us.” She paused as everyone leaned forward to hear the wonderful news, she continued, “But, unprepared in every way, the trip to the world will kill you. Just as it killed me. I’d have died if the Aliens hadn’t been waiting for me the moment I popped out of transspace.” There was silence. She smiled, looked at me, adding, “And we’ll need the total cooperation of Master Cheat and All-around Pain-in-our-collective-posterior, Sturdlan Vilbix.”
The Board Room exploded in the jeers, catcalls, boos, and an amazing calling-down-of-curses.
Resources: The Moon Trees, https://www.urbanforestdweller.com/we-almost-forgot-about-the-moon-trees/ ; https://www.space.com/moon-colonists-lunar-lava-tubes.html
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